real time upgrade #1

Greetingsoh lovely and loyal words(r)matter followers.

While celebrating the solstice and all the impending light it portends, I am inspired to try something new.  The idea is to take truncated samples of client-generated copy, or blurbs, bits and bites found on the web or in various publications, and to guide you, the words(r)matter community, through my process of upgrading them.  This will allow you to familiarize yourself with unconscious communication sabotage, while I demonstrate how to effectively upgrade our languaging patterns.

Here goes:

I nabbed the following quote from a blog written by a very famous and respected life coach:

Unlike Alisa I have a strong belief we should all listen to our gut instincts more, not less frequently and I’m going to try and explain why I think it’s so important.

What appears on the surface to be one, short, well-intended sentence is, in fact, a communication train wreck loaded with doubt, pettiness, and trepidation.  Do you see why?

Let's start with Unlike Alisa...:

The author could easily remove these words without changing the content of the sentence, while owning his truth without leaning on the inferred mistaken belief system of another.  Comparison is an activity steeped in duality, necessarily reliant upon another's wrong-doing/weakness/stupidity/inferiority/etc. 

...we should...

I've blogged on "should" before, so my explanation here will be brief.  Many humans are rebellious by nature and will unconsciously contract when being told what to do.  Should is a word that challenges our will, inviting contraction and defense.  Should is ineffective because, in many cases, it shuts down the receiver, making it exponentially more difficult to land our message, and to be heard.

...I'm going to try to explain...

Like Yoda says: Don't try; do.  When we try to do anything, we are communicating doubt; we are transmitting the possibility of failure.  Try is a confidence killer. Would you rather invest in someone who is going to try to succeed, or in someone who is going to succeed?

...why I think it's so important.

If he didn't think it was important, then he wouldn't be saying it, so the word is superfluous.  Moreso, it's wishy-washy, indicative of lack of confidence, of a consciousness waiting for permission to own its own beliefs.  I promise to blog more about this in the future - the habit we humans are currently outgrowing - the one that inspires us to evade our own knowingness in favor of statistics and heavily footnoted texts authored by academics with fancy initials trailing their names.  The point here is that in modifying his assertion of importance with those two little words "I think," he is undermining his own authority, his own experience, and advising his audience to cut him some slack in case he turns out to be wrong.

This is one sentence in a blog post comprised of several, and it is brimming with doubt, ineffectiveness and a slew of energetic Nos.  

Does this make sense?  Are you grocking the points listed above?  Please, comment freely, send me questions and feedback.  I'm curious to know how this lands.


  1. I find the most effective inclusion of this language upgrade paradigm, in following step-by-step:
    1. Write freely from Heart's intention.
    2. Use mind to re-view content, adjusting communication into confidence and direct efficacy.
    3. Observe the frequency of red-pen opportunity.
    4. Trust that practicing awareness will infuse evolving versions of communication.
    5. Yes.

    Thank you for calling us all in Dani!

  2. dear darling kinetic alchemy: big, booming, blooming yes to your step-by-step genius. writing FREELY from the heart is key. i regularly engage (and enjoy) a lengthy bout of free-flowing expression before tuning into the subtle energies while revising. i'm observing that the more i practice these tenets, the less dependent i am on my mind - the frequencies speak louder and more clearly than my cognitive channels. though, truth be typed, those serve a valuable function, as well. amen to your every harmonic yes, brother. mwah!!!!